Tardiness doesn’t bug the shit out of me unless it’s done too many times at work. I had a talk with Loretta TWICE about being late too often.

“There was a train!”

“The stop light took too long!”

“Ok, I think the stop light is broken now.”

Really, Loretta? Really?! Then explain to me how I live 15 minutes farther from work than you and I almost always manage to drive into the library parking lot 10 minutes before my shift starts?! Tell me right now, Loretta since you know everything and all!

I overheard her talking on the phone with her husband about a new Kroger’s opening up in their area soon. She wanted her husband to tell their youngest son about it, who’s god forbid, enrolled in PUBLIC high school. (Read my previous blog post, The Good Catholic.)

Why would her son be interested in a new Kroger’s? I’ll tell you why. This sorry excuse for a 16-year-old teenager was over 10 minutes late to his first job interview at Kroger’s as a bag boy. I wonder where the fuck he learned that shit from! The apple certainly didn’t fall far from the tree.
I walked into her very angry phone conversation with her son about it. She was practically screaming into her cell phone.

The thing I absolutely hate about conservatives is that the majority of the ones I’ve had the displeasure of interacting with always criticize Millennials. They incorrectly consider anyone at least 10 years younger than them a Millennial. Ok, I’m sure there are worse generations than Millennials. For one, we certainly didn’t try to fight to legalize slavery, or anything heinous like that.
I’m a Millennial and I’ve never been over 10 minutes late to a job interview. I’ve been working since I was 16 years old too. I’m almost 30 now. How’s that for being a Boomerang Peter Pan Snowflake, bitch?! My mom didn’t even have to tell me to go anywhere on time. I just did it on my own!

Anyway, try to think twice before you criticize my generation, or any generation again because you’re probably a pathetic excuse for a human being anyway and raising your kids, Generation Z into hapless, hopeless asshats.

The Good Catholic

Lauren called me yesterday to vent about work. We don’t have a lot of opportunities to have hushed and rushed vent sessions with each other at work. Lauren is the circulation supervisor at my library and she too deals with the woes of supervising petulant adults.

Somehow the conversation lead to Loretta. I mentioned how Loretta has been mysteriously taking a lot of sick time to take her son to the dental hygienist and doctor. It’s been often enough to wave a red flag at me. Maybe her son’s teeth are atrocious and maybe she’s got him going to gay conversion therapy a couple of times a month. I have no idea. It’s illegal to ask her unless it’s for a prolonged period of time and that calls for medical documentation.

Loretta has three strapping sons. Her youngest is still at home in high school. I can’t tell you how many times Loretta has bitched to me about having so many kids and having to pay for their private school tuition. Apparently all three went to the same catholic high school. I mentioned that to Lauren over the phone and she interrupted me.

“Which catholic high school?” she asked.

I told her I didn’t know. She then went on and on about how there aren’t any catholic high schools in the area. Lauren’s been living in this area for over ten years so it wasn’t like I could doubt her. I Googled it and she’s right! There aren’t any catholic high schools within a twenty-mile radius!

I just went into our shared office space and looked at Loretta’s pictures of her and her sons. In one picture, her two oldest are wearing soccer uniforms and she has her arms around them. Her t-shirt says ____ High School. I know for a fact that’s a public high school!

What the fuck? She’s been lying to me and possibly other people about all her children going to catholic school?! In fact, she bitched to me last week about how her youngest is failing his history class and she has to pay for him to go to summer school!
What the fuck is the point of lying about something like that? Does she think people question her devoutness? Or is this another weird form of Keeping Up with the Joneses?


Now that I’ve gotten my first blog post out of the way, it’s time to get down to the nitty-gritty – my job. I’m a children’s librarian and supervisor of a small eclectic group of people in a little, not-so-humble public library. I have an unhelpful assistant, Loretta. Loretta and I make up the children’s department.

Loretta is forty-something years old. A good catholic woman, or so she claims. She and her freakishly tall husband have been married over twenty years and have three strapping sons.  Loretta’s entire life is revolved around quilting like how my life is currently revolved around Star Wars. Did you see that Last Jedi trailer?! The Jedi must end?!
Oh, yeah. So Loretta loves quilting more than anything in her entire life, I would wager.

Before our Easter break, I gave Loretta a real talk. I have been working with Loretta since last August and she has been an absolute terror since Day One. I’m a new supervisor and was unsure of how to handle anything and needed a lot of guidance. Long story short, I was sorta thrown into this promotion somewhat reluctantly.
I reached an epiphany. I’m not gonna let this woman stomp all over me or the rest of the staff! This is my department and it will be ran the way I want! Who is she to be bossing everyone around?!
I wrote notes for myself to refer to during my talk with Loretta lest I forget something important. The list was modified slightly, but remains true:

Yelling at other staff. If it doesn’t sound positive in any way, don’t say anything at all.
Use yelling at Gerald as example. Must be respectful and professional.

Being bossy when you’re not anyone’s boss. Never tell anyone how to do their jobs. Don’t even make suggestions, unless it’s during our staff meeting and people ask for suggestions. Suggestions can be misconstrued as telling people how to do their jobs. Not your department, not your business.
If you have concerns on how someone else is doing their job, let me know and I’ll forward it to their supervisor.

Follow instructions. Don’t bend instructions to your liking. Gerald and Lauren also outrank you. You cannot tell those 2 what to do, but they have every right to give you instructions and tasks. When Jon and I aren’t here, they are the supervisors.

No more gossiping to people outside this library, especially during work time, with work phones.
Use engagement as an example. If it’s not your news, or your business, it’s not your right to tell anyone. People receive gossip differently and can spin their own versions, then lies are spread.

Tardiness is unacceptable. People rely on each other being here even if we don’t work in the same department. We need 2 people to open and if you’re late, that other person must wait for you, it effects their job performance. Mention policy. Must be at your desk, or reference desk by the start of your shift.

Schedule change. It’s what’s best for the branch. Starts 24th

The meeting took over an hour. Loretta is like a mad barking bulldog and I thought shit would hit the fan, but was surprised when it didn’t. She appeared more guilty and ashamed than anything else. But I couldn’t be sure if she was internally raging and plotting my murder, her resignation, or what!

I returned to work this morning after a long Easter weekend. I fantasized that she quit last week and everyone else failed to text me about it. But to my disappointment, I drove up to our library parking lot and there was her red truck parked in it’s usual isolated spot.

She was on her best behavior today, also to my surprise. Though she did question Lauren’s decisions on not having volunteers do the work that our staff get paid to do…